Muddy, Bluddy, and still a Fuddy

I was invited to a brown bag lunch with the Dean today and a few fellow faculty. The topic was mentoring of junior faculty, which reminded me that I had not posted a followup on my blog to last year's entry about being "drug through the mud." So here goes.

A colleague of mine who likes to stop by and tease warned that I would have a case of the "tenure blues" after it was finally decreed I am worthy. He suggested life wouldn't really change, and you would wonder what the hubbub was about. He was right - to a degree. As I alluded to in the pre-tenure entry, it had gotten to the point that tenure was no longer seen as the peak on the mountain. I would still wake up the next day, put my pants on one leg at a time, and go about my business. I distinctly recall after being summoned to the Dean's office, that I had to run immediately to my next meeting. There was no pause for reflection, no trumpets blaring as I strutted with my new status into the room - there was only the business to attend to.

At the same time, I also distinctly recall the Dean's expression and tone as he paused and said to me (and my colleague Mary, who I am so happy for!), "make no mistake, this is a huge deal." In that moment the enormity of it hit, even if it was fleeting as a hustled off to my next task.

As we talked about the ways to advise and mentor junior faculty, I surprised myself at the platitudes that came out of my mouth about what is really important. I believe it is important for junior faculty to work on what they love, not count the beans, and worry more about constructing a story. But each individual has her/his own story, so it is important to get that story out. Otherwise, if you sound like you are telling the same old story, you will get evaluated the same old ways, and there is nobody to blame for that but yourself. I remember hearing such esoteric advice as I was pursuing tenure, but only now do I understand how true it is. the problem then, is to help translate that message into tangible action. I'll suggest the following loosely connected tidbits:

1. Have a plan. "Publishing 2 journal papers per year" or "getting an NSF CAREER award" is not a plan. Those are artifacts of the plan; residual effects borne out of the process. My chair in my intermediate probationary review had a conversation in the hallway after I turned in my 3-year binder. He said (paraphrase) "Kevin, tenure is not about what you are working on today and whether it got published or funded or whatnot. It is about whether you are worthy of the investment. And to be worthy, you have to show that you can succeed in whatever it is you choose to do tomorrow." And to me the way to do that is to show you can device a plan and execute on it no matter the challenges that arise.
2. Don't get too much advice. We talked in the Dean's conference about just how damaging some senior faculty can be with seemingly innocent comments. I mentioned that I had "rabbit ears" (a baseball term for hearing what fans in the stands are saying about you), over interpreting what senior faculty said and considering behavioral changes because of it. Yes, get mentored. Do not get advised. And above all, don't deviate from the plan because some dinosaur stops by with a wisecrack about the process.
3. Tenure is not an evaluation on your career. I understand now why some people leave academia before getting tenure. I understand why some people leave after getting it. Tenure may be an evaluation on whether you and your institution and a good marriage, but I know several excellent faculty at this institution and others that were initially denied tenure elsewhere. While the process is taken seriously, the end result, whether good or bad, is not "you're great" or "you suck"; it is merely "you are a good fit." Maybe that is where the letdown my colleague spoke of comes from.
4. Tenure is not an evaluation of life. Even more seriously, we have all read reports of tragic events when someone is denied tenure. To a certain extent, I do understand the passion and effort and blood/sweat/tears that goes into the career, and I do realize it is a bit disingenuous of me to say after getting tenure - but if you look at the tenure process as a judge and jury on your life - well get a life. While I was quite proud when the Dean said "this is huge", and I know I would have been very upset if the outcome was negative, I would hope that greater balance in life and confidence in self would have allowed me to move forward.
5. Reading, writing, and arithmetic. Remember the 3 Rs? Why do I mention them here? The best concrete advice I heard while going through the process was "write a little bit every day." Anyone who knows me well knows that I think publishing is a bit overrated in academia (my Dean would disagree), and maybe I'll blog some other time on that. But writing is a fantastic, thought-organizing exercise that everybody should do. I need to get my students to do it more. So don't necessarily write to publish, but pull up a Wiki and organize your thoughts in a coherent, provoking style. Then when it comes time to publish, you'll be ready. My first graduate advisor years ago taught me the importance of reading. She said her advisor told her she should read 2 journal papers every day. While I don't have the time to do that, I do try to set aside time each morning, when I am most receptive to ideas others are trying to convey, and read something thought provoking in my field. I find that I have to keep my notebook by my side when I do because the ideas just flow (if it is a good paper). And don't waste your time with bad stuff. If the paper stinks, don't finish it; your time is too valuable. I don't care who wrote it. Finally, arithmetic to me means, stay technically active. I worry about this given the burden of my administrative duties, but no matter what continue to practice your craft. Even if you go through an old text, pick up something new, even if it is not a research activity - stay engaged in the practices of your profession.

Most of all - do what you love. The luxury of the career is having that choice. No matter the burdens of the job, and there are many, I can tell you from my years in industry that academia is freedom, at least as much of it as you can have outside cubicle walls. So craft your story, and stick to it.

So here I am, muddy, a bit bloody, but standing. I am an Associate Professor, I am an Associate Chair. And I am the exact same person I was the day before I got tenure.

Drug through the mud?

Or is it "dragged through the mud"? While I was a graduate student a professor of mine made that statement with respect to the academic tenure process. Actually he said it was like getting dragged naked through the streets in the mud. Surprisingly, he left the university before actually going through tenure - perhaps he didn't want to go through that, or maybe he just decided it wasn't worth it after all, or maybe something better simply came up. I don't know.

But, a dozen years later I find myself disrobed and muddy after completing, just this evening, the final assembly of all of my materials. It is not all that dissatisfying though, and not nearly as painful as I was led to believe. The key word there is believe. If you can look yourself in the mirror each morning, and can honestly say you have acted on what you believe - then that is all you can really do. 6 years ago I left a fair amount of money on the table to return to academia for one more shot. But I told myself that I was going to impact academia with what I believe - that we do not prepare our students for industry, that we are too often self-serving, and that the individualistic approach in academia has long been disproven by all types of communities that are far more efficient. I enjoyed assembling my P and T packet because it reminded me that while I have not built the highest and whitest ivory tower for all to see, I have acted true to the values that I still hold dear. And if academia doesn't want me after that, well, ... their loss.

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Is there Sawx Magic this year?

Anyone who knows me knows me as a card carrying nutjob of Red Sox Nation - and proud of it mind you! So where do I stand w.r.t. Sox' playoff chances, especially in light of that juggernaut whose name I won't say?

Well, my answer is that I am not without hope. But a lot of things have got to come together at just the right time. The Sox have shown the capacity, at times, to be deservedly called an elite team. Lately they have been playing very well (perhaps in streaks). Theo made some fantastic deadline deals, they have a great homefield advantage, and some players who have not contributed are now contributing (hello Dice-K, Bucholz, and yes Big Papi).

Of course there are reasons to doubt them as well. Can Alex Gonzalez hit like he has the past 2 months? Will Ortiz go back into a funk when the spotlight turns back to the steroid allegations (which they undoubtedly will once they are on primetime TV night after night)? Are Lester and Beckett healthy going into the playoffs? And what do you do with Wake?

But these are all sideplots. To me the playoffs will boil down to a few simple deciding factors:

1. We believe we have the best starting pitching, a near-best bullpen. Do we? These are our hole cards without question, and we need it to come up aces.
2. Nobody wants to say it, but boy do we miss Manny's bat in the lineup. Not one word from me about wishing he was here, I don't. But Ortiz-Ramirez struck fear into every opponent, and could change any game when their turn came up. Every Sox fan in the last 5 years, in a close game, would count batters before these guys got up again. Youk and Bay are wonderful players, but we won't see the likes of that duo again for a long time to come.
3. Let's face it, these playoffs are more about those damn Yankees than it they are about us. If they play the way they have been playing, who is going to stop them? Nobody. Especially in that bandbox BS little park they play in (another post on that later). A-Fraud, CC, Burnett, Texiera all have to show they can do it on the big stage under the bright lights. Does CC remember 2007? You bet the Fenway Faithful will remind him.

In the end, these playoffs are the Yankees vs. the Yankees.

p.s. Am I overlooking the Angels. you betcha

In the end, you do what is easiest...

I have setup my blog on various hosted tools, as part of other tools (particularly at the University, like Sakai and Moodle), and installed locally hosted tools (doesn't everybody Wordpress now?). In the end though, I switched over to Google's Blogger because it is just so durned easy.

I must be going through a phase - lately I have been divesting myself of digital artifacts and environments, consolidating in an effort to make my online life more productive and less intrusive. We are always good at coming up with whizbang things, but not always good at figuring out how to make them effectively fit into our lives. That, we do on our own.

One thing this blog tool does not do (at least I haven't found it) is categorize entries to create a blogroll for different communities. So on this blog you will find an unordered mix of postings ranging from professional (Education, Software Engineering and Web Development) to personal (family, friends, and of course the Red Sox), to opinion (politics, society).

As always, what I post does not a reflect the position of my employer (Arizona State University or the State of Arizona).